The Love Lives of the Menendez Brothers

What makes someone fall in love with a person behind bars? Join me, Christi Chanelle, as I explore the fascinating and unconventional relationships of Eric and Lyle Menendez in our latest episode of Love u Miss u Bye. Discover the story of Eric's enduring romance with Tammi Saccoman, who found a connection with him after watching his trial. Despite never having a traditional family setup, Tammi's daughter shares touching memories of seeing Eric in a fatherly role during their prison visits, creating a bond that defies the confines of prison walls. Through their story, we grapple with the broader themes of love, resilience, and the power of human connection even in the most unlikely circumstances.

Meanwhile, Lyle Menendez's romantic journey offers a different perspective on love and loyalty. From his initial marriage to Anna Erickson, a relationship sparked by letters and solidified on his sentencing day, to his current supportive union with Rebecca Sneed, Lyle's story is one of emotional sustenance that defies the odds. Rebecca, a former journalist turned lawyer, continues to be a pillar of support for Lyle, underscoring the vital role that love plays in enduring the challenges of incarceration. As we anticipate potential developments in the Menendez brothers' case, I'm eager to share these captivating narratives with you and uncover what these stories reveal about love's enduring strength. Share your thoughts in the comments and stay tuned for updates!

Chapters

• 0:00 Menendez Love Lives
• 12:54 Menendez Brothers' Romantic Relationships
• 23:09 Menendez Brothers

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

And we are back with episode three of the Menendez series. I'm excited to get into the love lives of Eric and Lyle Menendez. I'm your host, christy Chanel, and this is the Love you Miss you Bye podcast. I have always been fascinated with women that fall in love with men in prison. I think I'm fascinated by it because I don't really understand it. I had an ex-husband that was in prison. I think I'm fascinated by it because I don't really understand it. I had an ex-husband that was in prison. I looked at my own life and saw what the positive things were about being with a man in prison. What was the attraction? Not a whole hell of a lot for me. Anyway, feel free to debate me in the comments. I'll listen. These are just my views and it's coming from somebody that's actually had to do it. I think it holds a little bit of merit. So let's get in to Eric and Lyle's love lives Now.

Speaker 1: 1:15

I have to tell you I've been covering this a little while now. I have done the deep dive, I have watched the movies, I have been engulfed in Eric and Lyle and so far what I have learned is I think I could definitely be a pen pal with Eric Menendez. He just seems more sensitive than Lyle does. I still feel that Lyle has a lot of traits of his father. Just from the footage I've seen and I've seen a lot he just doesn't come across as somebody that I would want to hang out with or be married to. I just connect more with Eric. He just seems more genuine to me. I would love to know your opinion, though. Do you feel the same way when you look at Eric and Lyle? Like, do you feel like Eric is somebody that is more fragile and sensitive and was kind of taken through this like a freaking tornado, like a whirlwind? You know it was just like he was. I just see him in this chaos of turmoil. Doesn't matter, though, because they already have plenty of pen pals.

Speaker 1: 2:35

Eric's relationship has been the longest. He married Tammy Saccoman on June 12th 1999. They had been friends for four years. From what I've seen. She saw his first trial and really really connected with him. She was married and had a daughter. He was fine. The husband was fine with her writing to Eric.

Speaker 1: 3:00

She would go on to write him a letter, not really thinking much of it. It wasn't like she was trying to make a love connection. He wouldn't write back for about a month. Then he writes back and they start to write each other back and forth Not quite love yet, but they're bonding. They're building a strong friendship. Also, during this time, she kind of backed away from Eric. She would later find out that her husband at the time was molesting her daughter and, if you think about it, who else is going to understand this circumstance more than Eric Menendez? You know what I mean. It's like I would go as far as to say that fate brought them together at a time that both her and her daughter needed somebody to understand. You know what this was all about. Her husband would take his own life before trial and the bond would grow even deeper with Eric, and her daughter's bond would also grow pretty deep with him. I read a statement and I'll read it to you. This was written October 2020 by Eric's stepdaughter and Tammy's daughter. Come on, daddy, we're going home.

Speaker 1: 4:13

What were my thoughts as a little girl visiting Eric? I loved it and thought it was normal. I thought that this is where my dad lived, in a big gray concrete mansion filled with bodyguards and his other friends. Being a little girl, I didn't know exactly everything, but my mom really tried her best to always be honest with me. At a very young age I knew my dad had done something bad that kept him from coming home to us, something that made us wake up at 5 am every morning, four days a week, to drive hundreds of miles to see him for the day and to watch him tear up every time we left.

Speaker 1: 4:53

Can I tell you all something else, though? Visiting him are some of my favorite childhood memories. My dad was more of a dad than most out there in the real world. I remember the guards allowing us to bring my homework up to 10 pages and my dad helping me with it every visit. Now they don't allow that, unfortunately. I used to play board games with my dad and his cellmates that were visiting as well. Back then you could talk to other inmates that weren't in the visiting room. I remember at Pleasant Valley we had this outdoor area with concrete tables surrounding grass and my dad would get all the other guys together and their daughters and we would all play football or soccer, card games etc. Things were a lot different back then for inmates compared to now. So, as you can see from her, she has no regrets. She loved her childhood. She bonded with him.

Speaker 1: 5:49

And he shows that he really, really loves her and Tammy. This is one of the success stories. At this point I am truly able to look at this as a success story. It was good for the child. It was good for the child, was good for the mother. I could I can see how Tammy was okay with this, because she would later move from where she lived to California so that she could visit him four times a week. They were never intimate.

Speaker 3: 6:18

You could only hold hands and you can kiss when you go in, and you can kiss when you leave, but other than that, that's it. That's it.

Speaker 4: 6:28

No conjugal visits.

Speaker 1: 6:29

So she didn't find that that part was that essential to their relationship and honestly I find it to be the purest way to bond with somebody. So I don't knock her for that. When I saw some of the interviews that she did and her little girls in the backseat as she's driving to the prison, I don't know if I could do that. I wouldn't want my son to have to go to the prison to see him. On some points it would be positive, like this is what happens when you're bad, this is what happens if you don't follow the law. So it's a good lesson. But he can learn that lesson without having to physically go there. I don't know, but watching the little girl go and do that, I don't know. I had mixed emotions about it, and my emotions are not right or wrong, they're just mine. So I'm glad it turned out good, but I don't know that I would recommend it to the masses. I wouldn't recommend taking your six-year-old daughter to prison to meet a guy that you met after he murdered his parents. It just would not be something I would recommend. At the same time, it worked for them. So every case is different, every situation is different. We look at cases and we're seeing it from the outside perspective. And the outcome, the joy Like they never thought they were getting out, like she was married to a man that she never thought was getting out. She took a chance and when I listened to her interview, she says I married him, yes, because I loved him, but also because wives have more rights to learn about their husbands and to be involved with the things that happened to them and she wanted to be so. That was a reason she also said, which caught me a little differently I was in love with him then and I'm in love with him now. It was almost an afterthought in her statement. And then she says he's gone through a lot. I'm paraphrasing. That takes its toll on a person, but I know deep down he's a good person, which tells me they've gone through some ups and downs and maybe not totally in love anymore, but more of best friends, which would be obvious because they don't have an intimate connection of best friends, which would be obvious because they don't have an intimate connection. She also lives in Vegas and I believe he's still in California, so she did move away from him and has her own business there. I'm curious to see why she did that? I don't have the answer to that question.

Speaker 1: 9:04

She does have a book that she wrote in 2005. They said we'd never make it. I have not read this book because it's not on Audible, and you already know I only read books by listening to them. I just don't sit and read books. So if you've read it, I'd love to hear about it. Please let me know. Send me a text message. It's right there in the show notes. Send text and I will get the message. So I'd love to hear it. Do you like it? Do you recommend it? Should I spend the time reading a book instead of waiting for it to come out on Audible, which it probably won't, because that was in 2005. They've been together forever Now.

Speaker 1: 9:40

I also saw footage of Tammy walking in the grocery store because he's allowed to get packages four times a year that she could send him, and she's walking through the store and she's talking to Eric Do you like this type? Do you like this flavor? Should I get this? And all very sweet and sincere. But she's paying for that. That's her paying for it. She's paying for all these phone calls. It's a lot of freaking money.

Speaker 1: 10:05

With my ex, I was always having to put more money on the phone. I was always having to help with commissary. It's important for them to have these things. It's survival to have these things. You can use it as money in there. But I wasn't able to fund it. That wasn't me. I wasn't that person and that is why I would. I would be so resentful that I had to pay for this, that you're making me pay for this Like it pissed me off that I had to pay for this, that you're making me pay for this Like it pissed me off. But because I had his son, I did, I did, but I'd never do it again. I'm not that girl. I would never do it again. And you know I talk about this in the Wade Wilson video, the Wade Wilson episode, that I do.

Speaker 5: 10:44

Kristen, I'm listening. We're going to be coming past each for real. I kind of like. I like your swag, I like your attitude, like I feel you Like. I kind of like you know, like you know how sometimes you connect to people like through a vibe. You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 2: 10:56

Yes. Without somebody, yeah what do you mean I connected through you?

Speaker 5: 11:04

to your picture, I was like I need to get a hold of this guy right, right now, straight up.

Speaker 2: 11:08

Like yeah.

Speaker 5: 11:09

I got listen. I got five fucking new requests on my kiosk right now and they're all from fucking which I'm not gonna yeah, I'm not gonna accept. But I got fucking. I figured they were gonna start coming in, you know what I mean. But I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna accept that shit.

Speaker 2: 11:24

I already got one. Get what you can when you're in there. What?

Speaker 5: 11:27

the hell Nah Should I I?

Speaker 2: 11:29

would. What the fuck? Just go ahead. What can you do? What can you do when you're in there?

Speaker 5: 11:35

What should I get from him? Tell me, tell me how to hustle. What should I do?

Speaker 2: 11:38

You tell me, tell him to put money on your book.

Speaker 1: 11:42

Give your homegirl sister some money and I'll link it here at the this video in case you want to watch it. I just this guy is sitting there and he's telling these women and men that he's in love with them and they're spending all their money on him and you hear them going well, I don't get paid yet, I get paid next week and it's just such a game to him. And I'm not saying that's what's happening with Eric or Lyle, but it was really, really nauseating to hear Wade Wilson playing all these people for their money. Can you imagine how much money she has spent in 25 years? A lot of freaking money. And that's probably why she wrote the book. He was probably like here, here's a way that you can make some money that will help support what's going on, which I respect. You know he allowed her to put pictures in there and talk about it because ultimately it was going to help pay for him being there.

Speaker 1: 12:34

On the Tammy and Eric relationship, I am really rooting for them to stay together. I hope it works out. I really do and I'll get more into the after prison possibility. After I talk about Lyle, let's flip it. Let's talk about Lyle Menendez and his relationships. Lyle soon fell in love with Anna Erickson, who he met as a pen pal. But who is she?

Speaker 3: 13:00

He'd talk to me at work and then when I was leaving, he'd call the cell phone with someone he couldn't call that collect. And then we'd sit and have a conversation while I was driving I didn't know LA very well and he'd say well, if you go down Figueroa, and he'd talk me through where I was driving and he was, he was just always around. Then when I'd get home, he'd hang up and he'd call my regular line and we'd sit and spend the evening together. And then if I was going to go grocery shopping, we'd call my cell phone and I'd be wandering down the aisles and he'd say what do you see? Oh, squirt. I haven't thought about that in years. You know it's great. Any telephone sex, you bet.

Speaker 1: 13:42

Anna Erickson is a former model and salon receptionist from Chicago. Her parents divorced when Erickson was nine, prompting her to move to Colorado with her mother. She began modeling at age 14, and I will say she's gorgeous, absolutely stunning. Blonde, long hair like Goldilocks and just a beautiful face. She was really, really a stunning woman. Eventually, anna returned to Colorado in 1987, where she began working as a receptionist for a salon called Shear Productions. Shear Productions owner Jeanette Lombardi described Erickson as an intelligent and energetic young woman, a very compassionate gal who never found the right guy. Listen, neither have I. I can relate to that. They took advantage of her because she was such a caring girl, said Lombardi.

Speaker 1: 14:32

Erickson saw Lyle on TV during his first trial, where she decided to write him a letter after noticing the lack of attention Lyle was getting as opposed to his brother Eric. She recalled her decision to reach out to Lyle saying I was watching the lawyers thanking people for all those letters of support Eric got and I thought to myself what about Lyle? Anna went on to write the Menendez brother a letter encouraging him to hang tough. Lyle wrote back and their exchange eventually blossomed into a relationship. To be closer to Lyle, erickson moved to Los Angeles in 1994, taking on a job as a contract administrator for a record company. After meeting in person, the pair fell in love and decided to tie the knot in 1996, on the very day of Lyle's sentencing.

Speaker 3: 15:27

Only through being friends and and then being, you know, alone, not having a boyfriend or anything, and being close to Lyle, and then growing to love him. And then eventually, when you love someone and you don't want to be with anyone else you're not attracted to them in that way and you can't have sex with the person that you want and slowly that part of you, that experience, that hunger, it kind of goes away. It's the strangest thing, not to say that it never comes back. But during that time sex was a, it wasn't much of a thought. I was absolutely ready to never have it again.

Speaker 1: 16:16

They continued to grow in their marriage until 2001, when Erickson found out Lyle was cheating on her with another pen pal.

Speaker 3: 16:25

He reached out to someone that had written to him. He enjoyed corresponding with her and he started to pursue her much in the way I think he probably pursued me. And she responded and unfortunately he was writing a letter to a friend of ours asking that she intercede and try and calm this other woman down. But in the way that he had written that letter it was obvious that he was saying to our friend I've been working very hard to try and bring about something with this woman and now I just I need a little time. And that was enough for me because I knew what he had been working towards. This with this woman was against our marital vows and it broke my heart and that's unfortunate. But everyone has said to me that knew us as a couple. Can't you forgive that?

Speaker 1: 17:16

Erickson decided to divorce Lyle shortly after discovering Lyle's secret lover. Since their divorce, there have been no reports on Erickson's current whereabouts. Since Lyle's divorce from Anna, he remarried yet another pen pal, rebecca Sneed, in 2003. Rebecca Sneed was a magazine journalist who wrote to Lyle Menendez in prison way before they married. In fact, the couple became pen pals 10 years before they tied the knot and they officially married in November 2003. Rebecca keeps out of the spotlight, but she visits Lyle Menendez weekly in prison, talking to People. In 2017, lyle said our interaction tends to be very free of distractions and we probably have more intimate conversations than most married spouses do, who are distracted by their life events, which I've said. That is the reason that this can work so well is because you're not distracted. You have to spend time talking to each other. We try to talk on the phone every day, sometimes several times a day, discussing his marriage further, lyle added.

Speaker 4: 18:43

I have a very steady, involved marriage that helps sustain me. Lyle added and supportive. She's been tremendous. She's from my hometown in New Jersey. She's a lawyer. She is Not in criminal cases and business cases, right or something. Do not let your wife handle your appeal, no.

Speaker 4: 19:02

No, that's not a good idea right, it sounds cheap but it really won't work out to her. She's tremendous and put herself through law school Impressive woman. You have to keep love in your life. You have to stay because you know you're surrounded by hard conditions here suppressive environment. So I just try to stay. Stay connected to something softer.

Speaker 1: 19:25

He ended by saying people are judgmental and she has to put up with a lot, but she has the courage to deal with the obstacles. It would be easier to leave, but I'm profoundly grateful that she doesn't. I can see that they've also been married a very, very long time. These two relationships have really sustained them while they're in prison. I mean, it's lonely, it's cold, it's masculine, it's a lot of testosterone all around you, and having that soft place to land and somebody to just talk to you and tell you what they're seeing outside and bring life to you is so powerful and significant. And I can see why these relationships would last, because both sides need something out of the relationship. It makes sense. It makes so much sense. The fact that these relationships have lasted so long is a testament to them and I'm happy that they were able to find such peace when their lives have been such turmoil. With that said, it looks like they're going to be released and maybe before January. This is coming. I will talk about this in part four of the Menendez series, but for now, of the Menendez series, but for now I just bring it up because can you imagine how their lives are going to change? Will these relationships be able to sustain the release of prison? Because when you've been with somebody that long, you're used to your patterns, you're used to your predictability, you're used to your life. This way, there is no sleeping in the same bed, there is no leaving the toilet seat up. It's true life, with true problems and true reality. Will these relationships be able to handle that? I'm not rooting for anybody's demise. I want them both to be successful. I want them both to make it.

Speaker 1: 21:35

I have my own opinion about whether both of don't seem to make it. The odds are not in their favor because the whole reason their relationship was there to begin with is gone. They don't need each other as badly as they did while they were in prison. Now maybe Tammy and Eric's relationship will be different. I mean, they seem to be really grounded and bonded. I I think that there's a chance. I don't know. I feel like Eric and Tammy have a better shot, just from my opinion on the outside, than Lyle and Rebecca. It it's just a gut feeling, but I guess we're going to see. I hope when they get out that they realize what these women have sacrificed to be with them and that they love them and that they cherish them and that these relationships grow to be amazing Because, honestly, both Lyle and Eric deserve that they really do. Yes, they killed their parents and I am not diminishing what they did there, but I feel like they've never really had a life outside of prison because their childhood was a prison.

Speaker 1: 23:09

I'm so interested to hear your opinions on this. Please don't let me down. Put your stuff in the comments and let me know what your feelings are. I have no doubt that you will, because everybody's got an opinion on the Menendez brothers. So next Monday I am not going to do part four. I'm going to save that. I feel like stuff is coming out every week. Want to be sure I catch all the latest information when I relay it to you, but I feel like it's getting closer and closer to them being released. I know this is huge. As I learn more information, I will share them in my short video clips on my YouTube page or on TikTok. All right, talk to you next Monday. Love you, miss you, bye.